Baconmundi – Baked barramundi wrapped in bacon
Posted by Ash Simmonds in Featured, Recipes on 31st Dec, 2011 | 6 commentsThis fish and bacon extravaganza will pleasure your tastebuds and leave you satisfied like you’ve never been before.
I’ve used Barramundi as the theme ingredient here, it’s an ugly but delicious fish, with plenty of fat and a flesh texture that’s more flakey than a fake-tan blonde.
The name is stolen from the Australian Aboriginals, with it’s original meaning being something like “river animal that we eat before Tuesday”.
Prep/cook time: 2 glasses of wine.
Ingredients
200gm/1.5″ thick Barramundi steak – skin on
2 rashers (slices for you heathens) of bacon – rindless
Haloumi (squeeky cheese!)
Bunch of bok choy
Butter (grass-fed rules)
Mayonaisse (whole-egg full fat, bitches)
Random herbs and spices
If we played some Barry White right now, those pieces of fish and pig would so get it on
The Fish
Lovingly smell the skin of the Barramundi, it has a lightly fishy aroma that will make you want to just devour it as is.
Coat the fish in extra virgin olive oil, then throw a fistful of random herbs at it and rub it around.
Lots of room for experimentation here, like that first time you got drunk and maybe too close to your cousin, but basically this is where you can be The Colonol of your own secret herbs and spices and make it your own signature taste.
You can't go wrong with just random stuff from the spice rack
The Pig
Deploy the bacon.
Now delicately lay that fish onto the bacon blanket like a girl you’re about to turn into a woman.
Flesh on flesh is such a wonderful feeling
Roll it up in the blanket like a dead hooker that you need to dispose of.
Toothpicks work better than staples
The Oven
Preheat the oven to 200°C/390°F (don’t forget to light the gas unless you have Sylvia Plath tendencies).
Line a baking tray with foil, put the Baconmundi in the middle and lay a fat knob of butter on top of it with a bit of lemon pepper or something sprinkled for good measure.
The aliens/CIA can't steal the thoughts from THIS dinner
Check after a few minutes to make sure it hasn’t transmogrified into a new zombie pigfish and escaped the oven.
Bacon secured sir
The Side
Cut the haloumi into about a 1cm/½” think slice and cut into bite-size bits.
Rip apart the bok choy like a dingo with a baby.
These foods require further colour
The Haloumi
Dump a bucketload of butter into a pan on low/med heat and melt it.
Toss the haloumi bits in there like you’re shooting craps.
Cook for maybe 1-2 mins on one side.
The before and after of the great haloumi massacre
The Bok Choy
Once the haloumi is half done, flip them over with gay abandon and chuck the bok choy in.
Feel free to plop some garlic or ginger in there, and if things start looking dry just deploy more butter.
Now we have a real vehicle for sauce
The Sauce
Once the Baconmundi is cooked (15-20 mins) and has a lovely golden brown slightly crisp look to it, remove it from the foil.
Now, carefully take the foil and it should be laden with the pure Awesomeness of butter and pig and fish fat with herbs.
Add a healthy dollop of mayonnaise to it…
Mayo on top, butter all gooey on bottom
Now mix it like Fatboy Slim.
Melted butter and mayonnaise mixed
The Result
Top down
Side
Open
Nutritional Info
Who the hell cares?
It’s seriously awesome, almost zero carb, fully satisfying but not overfilling, which is exactly what you want because feed your lover this and you’ll need to not feel bloated so the two of you can enjoy some music that sounds like brown chicken brown cow.
6 Responses to “ “Baconmundi – Baked barramundi wrapped in bacon”
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Saw this on reddit and i have to say that it looks amazing, I dont normally eat fish but this dish looks very very tempting! A sweet bonus that its keto friendly !
It was quite amazing, definitely one of the best meals I had in 2011 – home cooked OR restaurant built.
Eat some freaking bread. If your diet is so meessd up that you take out calories by not eating a food group you need, you’re crazy. Get rid of the sodas, chocolate, junk food, and all that. You can eat anything you want after taking that out of the equation. You should still being eating foods from all the food groups which are grains, meats beans, vegetables, fruits, and dairy.But when you buy bread get whole wheat. It is better for you.I hope the person that gave me a thumbs down knows that I have studied this stuff, I have lost weight in the past, and my brother is a personal trainer.
There’s no dietary requirement for bread, all it does is make food more convenient to eat on the move, and blunt the taste.
I shop around!! And soiemmtes brands will have one item with non-animal rennet, even though their other ones don’t. I find South Cape for a good range is excellent, Devondale, Coles brand and some random ones here and there that I don’t pay much attention to at the time. I just look at each thing every time I buy it
to expand on the first post, there are tolarilts that are low carb, whole wheat, high fiber, that are perfect for low carb wraps. almost every grocery store would have them, and they should be right with the regular ones. another alternative is to make pinwheels with just meat and cheese that you can wrap in plastic so they don’t come apart, take a salad to school and get a dressing packet from the condiments area if your school has that sort of thing. you can find low carb crackers to have with the pinwheels, or you can make them with the tolarilts. there’s a limit to what you can do going to school, but if you just rotate these few things, change the dressing you use on the wrap or the salad, meats and cheeses are very abundant in different kinds. you can take celery sticks, because they use more calories to eat than they have and have limited digestion, they keep you full. make sure to use italian type dressings to minimize the sugar you take in (dressings have sugar a lot of the time) or ranch, which has none usually. mayo is a perfect thing for the wrap, so is mustard.